Are you looking for the Baconsale episode where we rank Pepsi products? Well, then, you got the right one, baby! Today we’re discussing 27 popular soft drinks, such as Mountain Dew, Dr Pepper, 7 Up, Hawaiian Punch, and A&W Root Beer. Each soda pop will get a tier 1, tier 2, or tier 3 ranking. Additionally, we’ll discuss perceived health benefits, Russian conspiracies, corporate sabotage, failed experiments, and weird jingles & slogans—including the song that inspires Kent to go “girlwatching.”

I’m a listener! He’s a listener! She’s a listener! Wouldn’t you like to be a listener, too? Press play.